For purposes of this blog, let’s think of decisions as a commitment to a thought.
Reminder: Thoughts create our feelings and our feelings become fuel for the actions that we take or the inaction that we take…and that my friends is how we create our results.
When we want to create an outcome like losing weight, making more money, or launching a business…it all starts with deciding first.
Making a decision is where we can find our power to create the lives we want to live, the experiences that we want to experience…it’s the first step toward stepping into our highest and best version of ourselves.
It is how we create a life by design…we decide.
Sometimes, when we make a decision, we do it with the idea that we will know if we made the right decision by how hard it is to create the desired outcome.
We tend to think it was a good decision as long as things are going well, and things seem easy and then…when we have a bad day or things get hard, or feel like they are going south, we go right to the thought that we must have made a bad decision…again.
We think that if we made the right decision, the proof would be that things would be easy and sunshine and rainbows, daisy’s and unicorns and that’s just not true.
Whenever we make a decision to do something new or really put ourselves out there to create better results, we are likely to be doing things we have never done before.
It’s supposed to be hard!
- That’s how we learn, that’s how we create resilience.
- That’s how we grow in resourcefulness.
- That’s how we get creative at problem solving.
That’s how you deepen the relationship with yourself that goes far deeper than anything that gives you instant gratification.
The brain loves to keep us in confusion and indecision.
It’s the primal part of the brain that loves to keep us seeking pleasure, avoiding pain and conserving energy.
Remember, that part of your brain has a strong motivational strategy at play but a sophistication of a 3 year-old.
The brain also like to point to our past just to let us know how just how crappy we are at making decisions by recalling all of the decision of your past that you still hold in regret.
So…we become very reluctant to decide, and we become very wishy-washy about making a decision and for sure we don’t commit to the decision that we do make.
Many of us fall into the belief that life is just happening to us and that we have no control.
So many of my clients and students will say to me…”I don’t know how I got here.” And they go on to say…”I don’t know how to fix it.”
Decisions that you have made in the past are how you have the life that you have today. Decisions that you make today and tomorrow will create your future.
You are deciding in each moment where your life is taking you.
The message that I want you to hear is the power that you have over the outcomes in your life.
So many times we think that we are at the effect of what happens to us, what other people decide that we either benefit from or suffer from.
I want to give you a couple of examples…
Making more money; we believe that the amount of money that we are making is the decision of our boss or the organization.
We believe that we don’t have control over the amount of money that we make and that feels terrible.
That feeling of not being in control of our income generates emotions like resentment and frustration.
When we feel frustrated, we don’t show up as the highest and best version of ourselves, we show up in resistance and with an under tow animosity towards the organization, boss maybe even co-workers.
In this scenario, it’s easy to feel like the our income is not our decision. So I want to show you where you made your decisions so that you can see where you do have control and power.
Here are some decisions that you have made in this example; you decided to let the amount of money you are being paid determine how you show up…and, you decided to accept their offer.
You continue accepting their offer by the way you show up.
What if you decided to show up as the best highest and best version of yourself, giving value ahead of time.
What if you decided to show up all in for the company and the organization?
What would you have to lose exactly?
If this scenario is hitting a cord with you, here is the notion I want to offer you…
What if you tried on the thought…“I am getting paid in direct proportion to the value that I am bringing.”
That a much more powerful thought and then what if you just started bringing it like a value ninja.
Every day you ask yourself, “how can I add value?” “Where can I offer more value?”
You will either start moving up inside the organization or you will get recruited away from the organization.
I know some of this might be hard to hear but the point of this blog is to create a mind shift and so, I want you to be challenging some of your thoughts.
I know this works. I have experienced it and I have seen it work for hundreds of others.
Here is another example; having an amazing marriage.
I know we hear that it takes two and that both people need to be on- board or it won’t work.
We hear things like 50/50, give and take…but here is the magic formula.
It is this simple even though it is not easy but hear it is.
When YOU decide to work on your marriage and YOU decide to start showing up as a better partner and YOU decide the tone in which YOU will speak, the words that YOU say or don’t say, the respect and appreciation that YOU decide bring, the vulnerability that you decide to show, when YOU show up as the partner that you would like to have, YOU create space for that partner shows up too.
We all have to become exactly what we want to attract in every single area of our life and it starts with a thought and the most powerful thought ever is a decision thought.
When you decide to step 100% into emotional adult hood and stop making someone else responsible for making you feel loved, respected and appreciate, worthy… 1000 pounds of weight is lifted from the relationship and you create 30,000 feet of space for your others to show up as their highest and best self.
You get to decide…
- Decide what you want to weigh.
- Decide what you want to bench press
- Decide how much money you want to make
- Decide how you want to be in this world.
- Decide how you want to experience your life.
- Decide where you want to live, and how you want to live, how you want to eat, how you want to feel.
You do not have to continue living out the life of the decisions from your past.
So here is your work for the week…
Awareness is the first step in making any up level in your life so this week, spend some time thinking about decision thoughts.
Notice what your brain does when you are faced with making a decision.
Does it throw you a past experience as evidence of bad decisions you have made, does it have you thinking there is a wrong decision to make, what comes up for you?
It doesn’t have to be big decisions; you can literally do this awareness exercise when you are deciding what to have for dinner or what to wear or watch on tv.
This is really going to help you see exactly how your brain works in this area.
Next week I am going to share with you some real life decisions that my husband and I have made that created the life of our heart’s desire.
That will be so fun to give you a peek into our lives so that you can learn from some of our experiences in making decisions.
Until then…Have the BEST WEEK EVER!!!
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